ROOMS
OUR ROOMS HAVE A HINT OF ASBESTOS, AND MAYBE A DASH OF FORMALDEHYDE.
THE BALLROOM SUITE
Where elegance meets indulgence. Gilded mirrors, velvet drapes, and a lingering scent of scandal fill this grand suite. Channel your inner decorated emergency.
THE CONFESSIONAL SUITE
Tucked behind chapel doors, this candlelit suite offers velvet booths for whispered sins and stained-glass windows that don’t judge. So who's the one you think about in bed?
THE SMOKING PARLOR
A decadent den dressed in vintage smoke and mahogany. Sink into cracked leather, sip something bitter, and bet to someone their name is 'Cheap'
THE HONEYMOON DISASTER
Where love letters burn and vows unravel. Faded roses, soft blush linens, and shattered glass tell a story of romance gone wrong. What a shame, what a shame the poor groom's bride is a SHHHHHHH!
WHEN I SAY
SHOTGUN,
YOU SAY:
SHOTGUN,
YOU SAY:
SUBMIT
